I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I'm at about main and main street
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
