It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Randomize
