Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
