So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I think people are normalizing furries
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
