hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Randomize
