Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
He passed out mid-signature
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
