he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
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