You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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