I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
