He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize