i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
