and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
