god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
