I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize