so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
My breasts were aching with rage.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
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