love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Randomize
