What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Randomize
