the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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