Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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