i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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