I think i peed on brittanys purse
I hope mine doesn't look like that
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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