dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Randomize
