He asked to "fluff my boner.."
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
