Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
40s are totally the cure
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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