I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Randomize
