no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
