she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
