Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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