oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Randomize
