dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Randomize
