the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
