clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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