is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
