You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I can't open my eyes
Lol why not?
Because I have fat ankles and I'm drunk
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Randomize
