do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
