Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I could fuck to npr.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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