I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
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