I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Randomize