We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
Green mimosas i think yes
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
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