You're completely useless in the revolution.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize