i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
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