So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
