He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Randomize