Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Randomize
