tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
