So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Welp...herpes.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
