i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
