she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
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