Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Randomize
