Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
soo... how was my night?
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
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