I hate your face
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
