We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
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