But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
